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Love Is An Intergalactic Negotiation

Being in a relationship, it’s not easy at all. No one said it would be easy. Umm, actually it was implied. Love as the grand jackpot waiting for you if you played your cards right. That was a big hoax.

It’s more like having intergalactic negotiations suspended in the far reaches of outer space. You speak a different language from the entity seated at the other end of the table (or whatever it is they use in intergalactic negotiations). You have a few handy tools, sights reported by those who’ve been there. But it’s not until you shoot in through that door you realize something fundamental. None of those sightings have been of this particular alien. They’re all of the hundreds and thousands of other life forms that are alien to you and each one, like this one is different. You’re all on your own now.

No way to tell if they’re hostile or friendly. No way to interpret what a gesture is intended to convey and what your response will trigger. How then, is trust, a hidden but integral part of any negotiation, learned? You take a chance and dive the heck in.

Gridlocks happen, just as in every kind of negotiation. Confusion and mayhem may reign. Each side may leave much worse for the wear and just a bit poorer. And yet we continue to strive for exploration, for communication, for connection, for peace and harmony. It is the very stuff of life after all.

Besides, did you catch a glimpse of the stars when you were out there? You’re so small, such an insignificant speck in the galaxy. But it was you out there on that dangerous, volatile, gut-clenching adventure called LOVE. You earned your place in the cosmos.

(If you like the Idea-toons, visit the gallery or the Facebook album for more)

Not So Ugly Valentine’s Day Truths

How ironical is it to watch a movie called ‘The Ugly Truth’…censored? Minus the hot scenes, it feels caricatured, artificial and silly. Hmm, just like real life. So my dear children, here are my lessons for today:

  • Love isn’t pretty. Or neat or tidy. It has dirty fingernails (which are jagged), it’s a little less rectangular and more square than you imagined. But square is comforting. It’s surprising.
  • Fighting happens. Bickering happens. And not in the cute romcom way. Clashes happen in hurtful, devastating, ‘I’ll regret this all my life’ ways. You may break up at the end of the day. If you don’t, it’s love. As basic as that.
  • Yes, men are stubborn, egoistic, childish and silly. And women are moody, bitchy, manipulative and silly. Sometimes the adjectives interchange. Anyone who seems like they’re out a fairytale is lying. Bet on it.
  • Valentine’s Day is the annual bonus for retailers, media companies, restaurants and entertainment moguls. It’s a ploy by politicians to gain some publicity (and votes, hopefully). But it is a day that celebrates love.
  • The same guy who can’t find five minutes in the day to speak to you,  will run to the chemist when you sneeze. He’ll crib about having to keep the air-conditioning down when you’re around but he’ll hold you, unflinchingly in the stifling heat when you’re hungover. Men are mind-boggling.
  • The same girl who is too cool for Valentine’s day, who revels in singledom (even after she’s not) and has a 125% booked social calendar would prefer to snuggle up with a blanket and watch ‘Guess who’s coming to dinner’ on a weekend. Okay, women are mind-boggling too.

The truth isn’t ugly. It’s just bigger than you think. Just like love. Don’t let the pink teddies *bleurgggh* make you puke. Don’t go blind on the red hearts and try not to get lynched by a political mob for buying cheesy gifts. It’s just another day in the year; heck, it’s Monday! If you know someone whose smile makes you feel better, speak to them. That’s all Valentine’s day needs to be.

Alternately, you could get out a good book and your favorite comfort food. Love for self comes before all. Have a great day!

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*If you liked this post, you’ll want to follow the Facebook Page. I’m Ramya Pandyan (a.k.a. Ideasmith) and I’m on Twitter and Instagram

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