A Good Catch

I met a young man last year who was smart, successful, charming and good-looking. He was also single and he explained why, saying,

“There’s such a strong pressure on girls to land a good catch that I can never tell whether they like me for me or just because I’m a good catch. I like meeting women who are independent and confident because then, there’s an equal exchange of interest and affection, without the fear of hidden agendas.”

It made me think, aren’t men objectified just as much as women? A man has his own individuality, personality and unique traits that set him apart, over and above his qualifications and income. Just like a woman is more than a good daughter, sister, friend, lover, wife and mother.

Now, ‘good provider’ seems as outdated and offensive as ‘homely girl’.


A version is posted at Yahoo! Real Beauty.

About IdeaSmith

IdeaSmith is the digital doppelganger of Ramya Pandyan (intrepid train-traveller and frequent spouter of post-midnight rhymes and rants). As IdeaSmith she battles obscurity and slays boredom with her stories about men, books, digitalia and Mumbai. Ramya is a blogger, digital storyteller and spoken word performer. Meet her online persona as @ideasmithy on Twitter, Instagram & Clubhouse.

Posted on March 7, 2011, in Featured, Relationships, Times, they are a-changing, Yahoo! and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Finally… Thank you for the post. It’s not always about MCPs and women after all. The world is changing.

  2. there’s always ‘the other side of the story’, and this certainly is one! we had this guy in our building doing well as a research assistant in a univ in the US and his parents were looking for a girl for him…… and guess what? according to most people, he was just a student with an uncertain income, and hence, not a ‘good catch’!!! i really felt sorry for the chap… it didnt matter that he had a phD from IIT, but it did matter that he didnt have some fancy job at a famous company!

    • @Anu: Yes, I can recognize that example from others I’ve seen. A lot of people still haven’t made the shift to realizing that a solid education ensures a reasonable level of employability. How the tables turn in a few years when the same person races ahead of his/her peers in the workplace, armed with that qualification! I hope that’s vindication enough for the ones who’ve been rejected earlier on.

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