The Myth Of Virginity

The thing that bothers me is that people confuse virginity with purity and use the first to prove the second. Please, people, let’s get this straight: Virginity is physical, purity is spiritual.

Really now, aren’t we all adult enough (and that being in terms of having adequate knowledge of human anatomy and scientific breakthroughs as well as the maturity to see the full matter)? Re-virgination sounds like a ghastly concept to me, not just because of the physical implications of being ‘stitched up’ but also for what an ironical metaphor it is for reality. Patching up a tear to make it as good as new. Note the ‘as good as’. What a farce and to what avail? Let’s not even get into the reality of a hymen getting torn in sports and other strenuous physical activity.

The presence of an intact hymen doesn’t really prove anything, except the fact that the lady’s going to be shedding a bit of blood the next time she performs the act. It doesn’t tell you that she’s been faithful to the man (before he even knew her or not), it doesn’t say that she’s ladylike or has ‘modest values’. Hell, even if you knew for fact that she’d never done it, it doesn’t tell you a damn thing about her character.

I re-iterate:

Virginity has got absolutely nothing to do with purity.

Purity….spend a lifetime with a person discovering that…it’s the kind of whiteness that can’ t be sullied by other people’s deeds and misdeeds. It lies deep inside a person’s own actions. It’s also called character and it takes a helluva lot more than a bleeding tissue to find it.

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A version is also posted on Yahoo! Real Beauty.

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About IdeaSmith

IdeaSmith is the digital doppelganger of Ramya Pandyan (intrepid train-traveller and frequent spouter of post-midnight rhymes and rants). As IdeaSmith she battles obscurity and slays boredom with her stories about men, books, digitalia and Mumbai. She performs live and also blogs, tweets, Instagrams, Facebooks, +G’s, Youtubes and Goodreads all as IdeaSmith. Ramya is a blogger, digital storyteller and spoken word performer. She also runs a forum for aspiring writers called Alphabet Sambar. Tweet-bomb her at @ideasmithy.

Posted on July 30, 2007, in I'm An Indian Woman, Sex & sexuality, Survival Guide, Times, they are a-changing, Yahoo! and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 15 Comments.

  1. Most rightly said.

    But I have a more practical question for the “intact hymen=virginity=purity” people. What do you do after the first time?

    If I were one of them, I wouldn’t have a moment’s peace except by using Shaharyar‘s methods or some more humane alternative.

  2. true indeed, lucky that guys don’t have such tests! 😉

  3. Scorp Kitten

    2 Ideasmith: Standing Ov (indeed too much hype)!

  4. @ AnonEcon: 😀 And now we know what delights you have planned for your future wife…

    @ Ashish: It isn’t luck. I’d call it a deliberate strategy.

    @ Scorp Kitten: *IdeaSmith takes a bow* 😀

  5. Ya too much hype.

    On a lighter note, I read this joke somewhere that girls should lose their “physical” virginities as soon as possible, lest they die and go to heaven. That would be their worst nightmare cos then they might have to lose it to a terrorist.

    Ya, it is in poor taste, the joke i mean, but then the whole virginity brouhaha is in poor taste, IMHO.

  6. Re-virgination…Ha ha ha… Remind me to talk about this. Makes for good conversation piece! Ha ha ha…I can’t stop laughing!

  7. Ok, I won’t hold you in suspense – Revirgination is an anagram for ‘A Tonier Virgin’. Ha ha ha…How striking!

  8. Another Woman

    What an apt reiteration!
    I think purity is a far, far difficult concept/process than anatomical virginity.
    Yes the spirit and the soul, that’s it….

  9. I was not aware I am this lazy, never checked this site of yours even though I pretty much read all on the idea-smithy
    I agree that virginity is not purity, but then that does not take anything away from what virginity is.
    Now is that important is totally different question.
    But somewhere down the lane when it comes to monogamy, [my version of this one is slightly different]. I guess both physically and mentally I would prefer that any day.
    BTW we have a long heritage of following something when we actually have lost the essence and reasoning for the same, the hymen is one such

  10. @ anantha: Good taste is a matter of perception, I like it. 😀

    @ Brad: *Slap*

    @ moondai, Another Woman: 🙂

    @ Rambler: Ditto.

  11. ditto to ??
    sorry had too much to say in the last comment 🙂

  12. @ Rambler: Ditto to monogamy being most important, far more than virginity and other such rubbish. Ditto to the observation that we’re hopelessly trapped in out-moded habits and ways of thinking.

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