Comittment

Is it that scary?
It is that wonderful?

All of that depends upon the kind of relationships you’ve had. The kind of associations one has had with the word ‘comittment’.

A lot of us are scared.
Of being alone. But also of being hurt.

The best possible thing would be to have someone who was always there when we needed them. But they would never have any needs or expectations from us. Utopia.

There aren’t any free tickets in life. And it does take two to tango.

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About IdeaSmith

IdeaSmith is the digital doppelganger of Ramya Pandyan (intrepid train-traveller and frequent spouter of post-midnight rhymes and rants). As IdeaSmith she battles obscurity and slays boredom with her stories about men, books, digitalia and Mumbai. She performs live and also blogs, tweets, Instagrams, Facebooks, +G’s, Youtubes and Goodreads all as IdeaSmith. Ramya is a blogger, digital storyteller and spoken word performer. She also runs a forum for aspiring writers called Alphabet Sambar. Tweet-bomb her at @ideasmithy.

Posted on June 3, 2006, in Hormone hangover. Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.

  1. all about how u perceive it…:)

  2. ‘Committment’ isn’t scary, or wonderful. It is a state of mind, not a play on words. You wouldn’t be scared to ‘commit’ if the person is right, and you wouldn’t think it is wonderful, coz’ you probably wouldn’t notice that you have committed yourself. It’s just a state of mind, an unconscious transition from ‘wanting to be with you all the time’ to ‘can’t be without you anytime’.

    More like, I just want to hold your hands, and walk the sands.–>

  3. Hi..
    A friend of mine introduced me to your blog.
    I’ve been reading through.. I must say, I relate!

    Commitment, I feel is something that has been used and abused.
    To put it simply, when there is genuine interest, to see things through, one does find a way. I’m not talking of relationships gone drab and dry, for there I feel one should terminate it. No time and energy for unhealthy and no point dragging it.

    At the same time, I feel we look for instant gratification. We don’t get to know the person we claim to love. We don’t give it its due share. And, yes, we have become insecure of what we might miss instead of appreciating what we might gain.
    We’ve stopped living in the now and appreciating what we have.

    Hence, Commitment confuses us.. we find it scary. We need to look within and acknowledge why we cannot commit. Its to ourselves first and then another person.

  4. commitment, imo, is a conceptual adherence to a projected ideal, which remains elusive.Fulfilment in connectedness is not a faculty of the mind, an intrinsic attribute of which , on close observance, is discontent.Moot point , to me, when we relate is whether we are relating to the concept of the other or to the other…for relationships to be fulfilling, a spontaneous sense of connectedness is the key in acceptance of oneself and the other.In this non-judgemental space, where one is centered within, one relates.Fear is rooted in the concept of the “self” which strives to protect a cultivated image of itself, a mirage.We relate when we just are, a privilege we expereince in some spaces; when we strive to become something to suit the other, it becomes and remains an incessant struggle.In colloquial relating, more often than not, our relationships are sustained by the “other’s need for us” and we struggle to keep up this equation.Our sense of security emerges in the feeling of being “needed”.
    and when it comes to relating in intimate spaces, each of us comes in with a projection of what it should be like and strive to live up to it, again a conceptual adherence..we relate to our concept of love, rather than to the other..and few concepts stand up to a reality check…what we are is a far cry from what we see ourselves to be…
    sry for the long response; the post trigerred it…

  5. Abhigaya: Absolutely! Also, is your friend a friend of mine or a fellow-blogger?

  6. Abhigaya: I agree. Realistically though, at some point of time, it becomes near impossible to step out of one’s bitterness and fears and stay open.

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