Crush

My 14-year old cousin thinks the Indian Idol, Abhijeet Sawant ‘has nice eyes’. She has his album carefully tucked away between her best clothes. And she thinks the contestants of Fame Gurukul are soooo lucky because one of them got to sing a duet with him.

Ah….it is beginning! My kid sister is having her very first crush. She asks me “What’s that?” and sets me off on a trail of memories.

I don’t even remember my first crush. It was that long ago (and that many ago!) Was it that young executive on my dad’s team who pulled me onto the dance floor during the office party? Or was it the prankster of the gang, two classes ahead of me? Maybe it was that cute, new instructor who taught us about computers in school. Or perhaps it was one of the class studs, who threw a vague grin in my general direction once in a way.

It is an odd experience to meet someone you’ve had a crush on, some years later. Especially those hormone-laden, angsty, “Oh my god, he’s looking at me, I could die” ones. I met one of the aforementioned men at a wedding and he’s turned out pretty distinguished and intellectual….one of the few crushes I’m not mortified to admit to! On the other hand, there’s the fat, balding ‘looks like a soon-to-be-grandpa’ who is what remains after an over-indulged adolescence in booze and partying. And there was the guy who gaped and said, “Don’t we know each other? You were so-and-so’s friend, aren’t you?”….No, buster, I was the one who was too tomboyish for you to spare a glance…hehe, revenge is sweet.

When my vanity comes to the surface is when I whole-heartedly enjoy being a woman. When a guy who wouldn’t have given me a single look (let alone a second one), in my younger days, stops dead in his tracks and gapes….I know there is divine justice.

But I digress….that is the here and today. I wonder how anyone could think that ‘Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play’. Au contraire, today it seems like a simplistic pastime…yesterday was where the agony, the dreams, the hoping and yearning and fantasy lived.

Maybe because I was such a bookworm as a kid, several of my crushes were fictitious. Somehow I don’t find that funny at all. I spent so much time among my books, they seemed much more real and tangible than the world around me. One of my favorite male characters was Jupiter Jones, the leader of The Three Investigators series. To date, I think that idea colours my preferences….so many of the men I’ve been drawn to have been stocky, intelligent, logical and obsessed with being taken seriously (which is an apt description of JJ).

Of course there have been all those numerous film stars, music icons, models…..I’m rather pained when I watch their interviews and see the big gap that lies between a pretty face and an intelligent mind. My first reaction is “What was I thinking?” But well…I just wasn’t thinking, was I? A crush is meant to be enjoyed, not taken seriously.

Keep it simple and keep him at a distance and don’t give yourself time to discover that he’s just another idiot of a man. Love may be a four-letter word for me but I think I’ll have crushes for the rest of my life.

* A version is posted to Yahoo! Real Beauty.

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About Ramya Pandyan

IdeaSmith is the digital doppelgänger of Ramya Pandyan. I am a writer-storyteller. I work as a Content Specialist, consulting, training and delivering Social Content that drives conversations & builds communities. Tweet me at @ideasmithy or write to me at Ideasmithy[at]gmail[dot]com.

Posted on August 25, 2005, in Featured, Hormone hangover, Yahoo! and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. my first crush – i was 8 his name was D.J and he asked me to the school ‘dance’…

    also would u like to see my seaweed growing tips site? ha ha just kidding

  2. Honestly….after email spammers we have blog spammers. Whoever left those comments, if you’re reading this, kindly refrain from promoting your sites through my blog.

  3. Hey IS.. this is JJ! I can’t believe someone remembers me after all these years! Pete got too old for his stunts and Bob still works part time at the library where my grand kids go. But I’m still the same old.. very old.. Jupiter Jones!

  4. Ahhh… baby fatso. I love baby fatso. The good ole days of reading The Investigators n all… u wont find a bigger fan of JJ. Geez… my hotmail ID reflects his pet name and I have mailed out resumes from it!

  5. Wonderful…all my dreams come true after all! If the teenaged Jupiter Jones had had a girlfriend, she’d have been like me. The grown up (and grown-old) one I’m not so sure of though….intelligent boys seem to grow up into cranky old men!

    Apoorva: I remember seeing your email address and wondering I’d encountered another 3 investigators fan! Seemed like too much of a coincidence though…I didn’t know anyone else who reads the series. I have a collection now.

  6. Those blog comment spammers are all over the place. Unfortunately, the spammer signs up for a blogger account manually, but the rest of the commenting procedure gets done via s/w programs :-( So that sincere request of yours is unfortunately not gonna be seen by any of those spammers.

    I remember reading The Three Investigators in 4th-5th-6th grade; that series was much better than any of the Famous Five, Super Seven and the likes.

    Does anybody reading Bobssey Twins series?

  7. how can i not remember jupiter and the junkyard and their fone trees- i still use that technique when i need to make calls for my nonprofit!
    and brad- ya, i enjoyed the bobssey twins- nan & ned, Flossie & freddy- dark haired & blond haired pairs.after coming here to the Us of A, realised that they may have existed in the 50s!!!

  8. I remember reading one of those too. But the three investigators were my hot favorites…and the five-findouters before that (Ah…there was the irrepressible Fatty too!)

    Any ideas on how chubbiness/stockiness came to be associated with smartness?

  9. LOL “StockyIntelligentLogicalSuperseriousGuy”….u nut, val! One of those adjectives doesn’t describe you AT ALL!

  10. Hey IdeaSmith, Fatty belonged to what book? Five-Findouters doesn’t sound familiar. I remember reading books with Fatty in it though, just don’t remember the series.

    People make fun of the chubby girl/guy, And the chubby character makes a come-back by solving the case, hence.

    Hmmm, btw…Chet in Hardy Boys, and Bess (I am not sure about her name) in Nancy Drew series, both stocky , were characterized to be ‘not the intelligent ones’.

  11. comes from an earlier series popular in the 50s- Billy Bunter! stocky, spectacled! aww those gcarefree days of lazy reading…

  12. Saala u stole the name of my blog in ur post ;) I shud go and get a copyright on it now :) Needless to say, awesome post. I’ve wasted an entire morning reading ur blogs!! :)

  13. FullMoonOnEarth

    I used to love the Nancy drew series as long as I was in School. Fatty was in the Mystery series (my guess) by Enid Blyton.

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